I’ve Followed My Internet Boyfriend Here

I’m deliriously and happily married, and yet, I have an internet boyfriend. How, you might ask? Why? Aren’t you satisfied with the home fires? Are you looking around for something better, something different? Something else?

Nothing could be further from the truth. Like I said, I am very happily married. Witness the fact that my husband and I are having office sex on a very regular basis. And I am  in the throes of menopause, too! Oh, I had about two months of hot flashes and a month of depression, went to the doctor, and she prescribed some mother’s helpers and urged me to start using Estroven. After a couple of weeks, I was back to normal in both body and mind. In fact, I was better than normal. I’m not one who likes to take drugs, but in this case I would highly recommend it.

Back to the internet boyfriend: I happened upon him purely by accident. It was another place (online) and another time (last year). I had read his posts and found that he was weirdly humorous. I say “weirdly” because my sense of humor is definitely left of center. This person touched my funny bone in a way that is indescribable. When I read something he writes, I usually have a resulting laugh that originates deep inside my stomach and bursts out like a volcano.

Meanwhile, my interest in this person was that of “Oh, nice,” and at the time, I wasn’t looking to make new friends. Actually, I’d been out of the friend-making business for some time. The last time I tried to make a male friend online ended disastrously. He, too, was very funny in a biting yet witty way. He was a major talk personality on local radio. The reason it ended disastrously was multi-leveled. For one thing, he was too close in proximity. Yes, I met him. I shouldn’t have, but I was flattered that he wanted to meet me. However, after the second meeting, I sensed what he really wanted and it wasn’t friendship. It was difficult to extricate myself, but I finally did. So, as you see, I was in no hurry to make another male friend again.

Several months later, my internet boyfriend and I were playing a game on this other site. Okay, it wasn’t a real game, but it was one which he devised and I followed along. This was a fun diversion over the course of a weekend.

I can’t remember when, but shortly thereafter, I would leave more intimate comments on his posts. “Hi, I’m stalking you.” turned into “I adore you!” “I love you!” “I worship the ground you walk on!” Now, at the time, I didn’t know this person well enough to make such proclamations, but they seemed in sync with the game we were playing. So, my persona on that site developed that I had a crush on this guy. Other women there had snagged their personal “boyfriends” so I thought I would grab this one before anyone else could claim him.

Back in March, a bunch of us from the other site decided to hunker down (online) and discuss our future with regard to posting and having fun. At this time, we exchanged email addresses, and more personal mail. Only then, did I realize what a really nice fellow this man was. And I am proud to call him my internet boyfriend.

My boyfriend is also happily married and he has children, just like me. We share a wide variety of discussions, most of which I couldn’t have with my husband. (That’s okay, my husband thinks my mind is severely twisted. I think he appreciates the fact that I don’t burden our home conversations with my wackiness.) The best part of the relationship likes in the fact that MIB (my internet boyfriend) or MIL (my internet love) lives in another country. The likelihood of us ever crossing paths on a physical tangent is that of an ice cube lasting more than a moment in Hell.

MIB told me about WordPress. I’d been following him around here for a couple of months, and so voila! Now I’m here, with him and others.

16 Responses

  1. Thanks. I was thinking about writing a post a whole lot like this. I was going to describe how as a completely happily married fellow, I became attached to an internet girlfriend. Yours is ever so better organized than mine would have been.

    The things you describe for you match my own experience and recollection almost exactly. One difference is that my own encounter with an online person that I met who seemed to want what I wasn’t offering — I was married (to my same sweetie) and just wanted another silly friend.

    But, that was almost two decades ago and so I’m no longer shell-shocked by it. Nonetheless, while I was open to finding friends, I was completely clear in my head that those friends would be net.friends. It turns out I wasn’t as clearheaded as I thought. Another person corrected me on that. I no longer think the ‘net.’ prefix belongs.

    I remember that weekend. It was almost all one night. 44 articles I think! And, OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS ME OH MY WE WERE FUNNY!

    I wonder about the chances of our crossing paths. It seems pretty unlikely. I simply wouldn’t do it without our sweeties there too — not because I’m nervous about what would happen. I’m not nervous about that. I don’t travel without my sweetie. Why go somewhere if she’s not going to be there?

  2. The other thing about including sweeties is that when you are excited about something you want to share it with those you love. So it follows that you’d want to have the “whole gang” there.

    May I come along? I can take pictures? I can bring wine? I can babysit? I can … well, can I come to this meeting that most likely will never happen?

  3. Exactly. I mean traveling without your sweetie, although I’ve traveled many times alone.

    You are so right! WE WERE HILARIOUS! That was so much fun.

  4. You’re all crazy! Yes I’m jealous. Madly jealous. He goes around being your boyfriend, writing nice things about AJ (who in my opinion deserves nice things written about her) and creating fan sites to others all the while leading me on and trashing me at the same time. I think I have to cut my losses now and realize he’s just keeping me around based solely for entertainment purposes. I feel so used!

  5. Biblio-Imagine, I felt that way too, at one time. Parameters on internet love are dependent upon the people involved. I like where they are now.

    By the way, AJ is a saint! I could be her internet girlfriend, if she’d have me.

  6. Pandemonic…I like you new name. So many defecting from the site of a million inanities I thought it might be fun to meander around the blogosphere and have encountered some familiar voices. Ya’ll are looking mighty snazzy over here and I have not been annoyed once…hmm…

  7. Pandemonic…I like your new name. So many defecting from the site of a million inanities I thought it might be fun to meander around the blogosphere and have encountered some familiar voices. Ya’ll are looking mighty snazzy over here and I have not been annoyed once…hmm…

  8. Internet Boyfriend — it’s a great concept. I should get me one. Bibliomom, I’m jealous, too. Or confused. Possibly both. Definitely both.

  9. […] I sent off an email right away to make sure that my supporter understood that I’m very happily married and got the perfect reply. Not only did she understand, she was happily married too. I could express gratitude and return her affection with no fear of any bad nuttiness resulting. Not only did this solve the problem presented by the boyfriend/girlfriend game, it was a safe situation. I cheerfully let myself be claimed as her boyfriend. She protected me from bad nuttiness and our association opened up a whole new realm of humour. We went on a rampage of silliness and satire. Others joined in the fun. We had staged scandals. We produced absurdities that still make me laugh months later. And, we got to know each other in the mean time. I realized just how lucky I’d been to have been claimed by this woman. She isn’t just funny. She is wise and compassionate. She is kind and passionate. I noticed that when I typed the words “I love you” to her that it wasn’t just public silliness. I do love her. She’s my friend. And, now she’s here. […]

  10. Love the name, and I’m very glad you’re here. I followed two other friends and found a whole fleet. 😉

  11. It’s wonderful, isn’t it, Shawn? And thank you, MIB.

  12. It is wonderful indeed. I’m rather hoping some more appear. I suppose I should do a bit of poking around in the friendly other place (as opposed to just the other place) to see how the diaspora has progressed. Maybe tomorrow.

  13. I did! That fluffy cat rules!

  14. Well my story is a little different . The thing is I met mine about a year ago on the internet .At first I didn’t think much of it then we started IMing alot and getting closer . I didn’t really know what to think at the moment. He then wanted to take it a step up to call me so basicly I refused for a long time thinking I will never call or and never give him my number. The reason I refuse so nervously is because I was trying to be careful. So one day my dad came over and visited and gave me a calling card to call my friend who lives in London so i took it . Later on that evening I still had the new card on my desk then all of a sudden my internet boyfriend IMed me and started taking , he then brang up about calling me again . Since I had the calling card I agreed , right after I agreed he was highly happy . He then gave me hes number and I called . Next , he picked up and I then heard hes voice. To begin with my first impression of hes voice was bad but I then grew to be attracted to as we talked more on the phone. I ended the phone call in about 30 mins and I thought to myself I would never call him again and it might be too much of a risk .But the next morning I was on he IMed me and started begging for me to call him so I agreed again , as we talk I began to suddenly start to love him ( I felt really strange loving someone I never met before ) . But he was single so it wasnt that bad and so was I . To end the story quick , we still talk alot on the internet and phone and through webcam. we havent met each other yet but I hope someday we will in the future

  15. Can I be your internet love child? Would it help my cause if I told you I love you both already? Cuz well, I do. But, you both know this. I should start a petition.

  16. Oh! What an idea! I’ll have to run that one by My Internet Boyfriend!

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